That is a good question, right?
Before the pandemic, the answer to this question might have been different than it is today. Our lives are getting back to normal, but many people are realizing they do not want the same life as they had before. Perhaps saying no to obligations was difficult, maybe you realized that your relationships were unhealthy or that you had some issues of the past that you needed to resolve. Whatever it is, it is both scary and empowering to decide that you want to create something new for yourself.
The real question is not in your ability to do so, but in your level of confidence to do it. It is worth asking yourself, how confident are you feeling about making the change you want in any area of your life?
I wish I could wave a magic wand and all the confidence you need would be it at your finger tips. As we know, it does not work that way; it is the built in small steps we take each and every day.
It might surprise you to know that I also have struggled with the feeling that I was not enough. The feeling of not being capable of doing the things I dream of, left me feeling powerless. We all live in some form of what I call the “not enough” world. We feel we are not smart enough, good enough or capable enough to get what we desire. More people feel this way than you can imagine. It undermines our level of confidence, but the good news is it can be changed!
You might be wondering how you can boost your confidence:
First, we must recognize that the thoughts and actions we have about ourselves is a habit. I know it may sound simple, but we have trained our mind to think negatively about ourselves, and what we are capable of.
This bad habit is our default mode that keeps us stuck in the same place and we go round and round unable to get off the merry go round of negative thinking. One of my favorite sayings is, don’t believe everything you think. The idea is that when we can recognize the thinking is negative, we can reframe the negative into positive, it changes our perspective. We can now choose to think about ourselves in a more positive light which gives the freedom to look at the things differently and then begin to make a change to a more empowered way of being.
Secondly, start small. Identify something you want to change and make a small goal that is achievable. I always suggest people do this because it is important to set yourself up for success. As each small goal is achieved you will gain confidence that you can also reach another goal. That is how it works, building one success upon another, one step at a time.
And lastly, identify a time in your past that added to your confidence? What did you learn about yourself from this experience? What can you use that will help you now?
Remember that you are more resilient and capable than you give yourself credit for. There is one thing I know for sure and that is that you can make any change that you want. My hope for you is that you believe this with your whole heart. Don’t wait a minute longer to get what you desire.
Due to more demand for coaching I have opened a few more coaching slots. If you want to make a change in your life and are not sure how to do that I would love to support you in making that change. Reply to this email to set up a “no-fee” conversation.